Friends it has been too long. Maybe not for you, but for me. The rambling thoughts continue to swirl and I find myself eager to finally sit and spew some upon you. My apologies in advance. First and foremost, I have decided to clear the air and let go of some of the things that, as of late, I am over. That’s right. I have officially broken up with the following. Good riddance.
1. I am over being skinny. That’s right, done. Healthy, active and eating nutritious foods are in, but skinny? Done. I am finally okay with the fact that I am no longer the skinny girl. Pretty darn liberating. My stomach jiggles, as do other parts, and it is totally okay. A little cellulite to round out the field and that’s fine too. My husband is hot and he likes me which is an added bonus. After all who am I trying to compete with? Professional models or the 16 year old girls at the mall? Um, no thanks. I’m a 32 year old mama of three who has no desire to wear skinny jeans or be a size 2 ever again. Been there, done that.
2. I am over being anyone other than myself. Over it. We have lived in a number of different “flavored” cities in the past decade. Cities where people are “nice,” introverted, stoic, hard to read and quiet. I am NONE of these things. The more that I try to become these things, the more miserable I am. And so I’m done. I will simply be the high energy, extroverted, tell you what I think at all times person that God created. I will drink lots of coffee and complain about cold weather because I miss the sun. That’s who I am.
3. I am over trying to make my children be anyone other than who God has designed them to be. Over it. The exhaustion of trying to reign in a high energy child, while forcing a shy child to talk more with new people, to pleading with children to not pick wedgies in public and the list goes on. What a drain on me AND my sweet girls!! They are great little people and individuals. Why would I mess with that? Next time I catch Molé digging in to retrieve the undies that have nestled in between her sweet tush I’m claiming her in all her wedgie conquering glory. After all, props to her for being brave enough to relieve the discomfort in public rather than doing the secretive movements adults do to adjust the same problem.
4. I am over comparing when my kids did what, for how long and how well with your kids. OVER IT!! I don’t care because you know what, if we’re being honest, there will be lots of things that your kids do better than mine. And there will be things that my kids do better than yours as well. And, on top of it all, there will be things that all of our kids do poorly. There, I said it. Not all of our children are the geniuses that we claim them to be. They are flawed just like their parents. Some will be totally awkward in athletics, others will not be able to hold a tune to save their lives and some may need extra help to pass math. ALL OF THAT IS GREAT! The sooner that we as parents start being real about the fact that our children are not perfect, and start to celebrate the huge RELIEF that that brings, the better.
5. I am over trying to be fashionable. Over it. To be honest, I would rather spend an extra $5 on a latte than a cute article of clothing. There is nothing wrong with wearing cute clothes or being fashionable. Nothing at all. It’s just not me. I am a jeans and t-shirt with minimal make-up, gets my hair cut once a year at a haircut chain, forgets often that I need to “groom” my eyebrows, leaves the house without brushing my hair at times, can’t stand to wear anything that is uncomfortable kind of girl. What is the first thing I do when I get home? Put on sweats! I cannot relax in anything else. Call me quirky, but this is how I roll.
6. I am over having a perfect home. Over it. If you ask my dear mother, she will testify to the fact that I have never been neat. My room was a disaster area as a kid. I am really, really good at making clutter. I could probably go pro. I have never been a person who felt the “urge” to clean, scrub and perfect my house. If I have an hour of free time, it will not be spent cleaning regardless of how many dishes are in my sink. My house is messy because I’m spending my time doing other things, not because I’m lazy. That is a revelation. I used to think it’s because I was lazy, but the more I speak with people who do have tidy homes (let me say that my house is clean, but cluttered. there is a difference) I find that these are people who actually enjoy cleaning and are driven crazy by clutter. Alas, it all makes sense! Have no fear, though, because if I do invite you over I will pick up. :)
I could go on, but I have three children in beds and I plan on joining them. Even if it’s only for five minutes. What areas of your life do you need to let go? What is bogging you down? If you find yourself stuck in a cycle of comparisons or expectations let it go. Find freedom in allowing yourself to lay down the burden and guilt of it all. Be yourself not only as you mother, but as you live. In all things be YOU.